Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

Knowing the difference between an awareness campaign and fund raising campaign is very important. Its something I wish I knew sooner.

The thing that shocked me the most was how lonely I felt. How empty I felt. Cancer was destroying so much more then my body. Just like the rouge cells turn and mutate the good cells it was doing the same to my soul. I was a roaring fire now I’m barely more then a spark. I didn’t understand how a pink ribbon could make any of that feel better.

I was ignorant.

I don’t live in a world that I have to hide my illness. I don’t feel shame. I am lucky.

With awareness comes solidarity.

When the body is under attack it starts shutting down. Some weird self preservation mode. The same thing happens to your mind. You shut down.

I ignored symptoms. I allowed fear to cloud my better judgment. I allowed fear to consume me.

Now when I see the Pink Ribbon I don’t feel as lonely. I feel all the people lost before me and all the people thriving and living cancer free lives. I finally see the intent and it feels good.

The Pink Ribbon was never meant to reflect how cancer feels, its a white dove, a remembrance flag, a salute, a hello. It’s everyone effected by Breast Cancer secured in a never ending loop.

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